Miracle Worker?

I have been given a Miraculous Medal.

Ostensibly, to help me find a husband. Apparently, as I am now 30, I am beyond hope and need all the help I can get.

My friends mother, a darling 82 year old Irish lady, is a staunch Catholic, attending mass most days. The medal was passed to me with words along the lines of "I gave one to X last year - she's getting married now, and she's MAD, so she is!".

Thanks - I think.

But you never know.

For those of you unfamiliar with Catholicism, the Miraculous Medal came about when the Virgin Mary appeared to St Catherine Labouré in 1830 and told her to design a medal. Mary said "Those who wear it will receive great graces".

Does a husband count as a great grace? The way some friends complain about their other halves, the great grace would be if they disappeared in a puff of smoke. But I guess the grass is always greener . . .

Lucy (flat / bestest mate) has leapt on this idea with glee. I walked into the kitchen, only to be met with "It won't help you find a husband if you leave it on the kitchen table. THE KITCHEN TABLE DOESN'T WANT TO GET MARRIED!!!" bellowed down my ear.

And if I happen, as a result of wearing the Medal (yes, it is on a chain round my neck) to meet the love of my life, I will certainly let you know.

The shag of my life would be a step in the right direction . . .